I cannot think of a better term because I am no expert. So I chose "neurological-programming". Why I chose to post on this is a long held opinion of mine on the two main "thought programming" issues affecting most people, to the extent that it limits their ability to fully self-actualise, be the great and wonderful person that they can be. None of these are scientifically proven or back tested but I am sure it resides in us in some manner or form. If we are able to negate and rationalise away them properly, we have a better chance to succeed as a person in all aspects.
The first is fate. In particular if a person is aligned closely with most religion, fate is a concept that seeps into our conciousness. I am not saying that there is no such thing as fate. The bad thing about fate is our resignation to fate. In Malay, there is a powerful word, yet debilitating so, its called "rezeki". In Islam its got a wonderful higher meaning, God's Providence. That is all well and good. It gets negative when we use the word fate/rezeki to explain our dire circumstances or under achievement as a person.
If there is such a thing called fate, and all things are resigned to our fate, then we might as well close shop and do nothing. Some even get into the self defeating attitude that it is not holy or no use to fight against fate. I think if you are religious, they would all teach us to be the best person we can be, not one resigned to fate.
When bad things or not so pleasant things happen to us, it is how we react and behave to those dire situations that maketh a person. I do not believe any God in any religion is there to condemn us to the worst atrocities and situations deliberately to put us there forever. It is there to test our resolve, to re-measure our worth as a person, to hone and refine our determination to be a better person all the time.
There is a big difference in accepting and appreciating your situation, and acknowledging your situation and trying to make it better. Don't wallow, don't get overly indulgent in self-pity.
The second most debilitating "neurological programming" issue is the thought that "I hope nobody finds out how average I am". Even when we secure good, well paying positions, deep inside we sometimes tell ourselves that we are not worthy, that we are really not that good at all.
This does not affect just careers but relationships as well. Too many people have that deep seated apprehension and it affects and cloud the way they avail themselves to the rest of the world. In some cases, it can be so debilitating that they do not think they are deserving of the care, love and attention of another.
The often quoted phrase, "love yourself first so that you can love others" has been diluted thanks to over repetition. The negative reel playing in our minds every now and then causes us to doubt ourselves over and over again. When something good happens, you dare not take it up because you fear that its all going to blow up later when they discover that you are just "average".
Its not a matter of intellect, we deserve to be as best the person we are just because ... we are. Life is too short to make a mess of it. Live well, live strong .... bloom where you are planted.
